Inertia

I keep writing and re-writing new lists of things I need to do before leaving, but lately I haven't been crossing much out. I have a lot of time on my hands, and I find the more free unstructured, time I have, the more I waste it.

Since last week, I have lost three days of valuable time just sitting around, surfing the internet. I've even taken up Tetris (shows how far I would go to avoid moving forward.) It’s as if the enormity of the task at hand makes me paralysed. At the end of the day, I realise I’ve accomplished nothing, and then I proceed to feeling bad and feeling stressed, which further adds to my anxiety.

My challenge this week is to make a schedule that I will stick to in the next two weeks because I am leaving on Dec. 1st. So far, today has proven to be a failure. 3:20 PM and still no progress in my packing and planning.And still no progress in this pending translation that I wanted to finish before leaving. By this time in the day, if I haven't done anything, I'm pretty much useless. The one thing I'm usually capable of doing is getting to the gym. I may give that a try.

I’ve always been intrinsically motivated and this new idleness is freaking me out.